Nine Things You Should Never Search For On Google


Reddit, being Reddit, has put together a brief list of things that you really shouldn’t Google.

They are mostly things that are a bit disgusting, some of which we filtered out because they’re just too NSFW.

Either way, you should be warned that if you do choose to search for the things on the below list, they may not have pleasant results (apologies to adjacent colleagues and the IT department looking through my work computer).

We’ve done our best to describe, but we will not hyperlink. We’re not monsters.

See the list, below:

1. Fournier: Orlando Magic NBA player Evan Fournier’s nickname is “Never Google” and there’s a reason. His last name, which is an old French word for “Boulanger” (or “Breadmaker”), is also the name of a type of gangrene that affects the genitalia. You’ve been warned.

2. Krokodil: The street name for Desomorphine, a morphine derivative with powerful opioid effects, which has been used as a substitute for Heroin in Russia and Ukraine.

The side effects of the often-illegally produced drugs include toxic substances which can “cook” the skin, or cause large scale tissue infection or damage in the injected area. It’s become known as a flesh-eating drug.

3. Your favourite food: You’ll only get hungry. See, they’re not all about flesh-eating this and that.

4. Mouth larva: One Redditor was looking for ‘moth larva’ and instead ran into this beastie. We can confirm, it’s exactly what you’d expect and you shouldn’t go there.

5. Google: Haven’t you heard that 100 per cent true thing about the infinite loop and the world ending?

Also, chances are your URL field is also a search bar – save yourself some time and search for what you’re looking for (if not, change your default search engine to one you want)

6. Calculus Bridge: It’s not a really hard maths problem. It’s hardened plaque across the teeth – a big old chunk of it. Generally it has to be chipped away by a dentist. It’s not that pretty.

7. Your e-mail address: It can be illuminating to see what you’re linked to online, and sometimes terrifying.

Reddit users reported sold accounts, spam, password leaks, the lot – in fact, it’s probably safest to search to double check, even if you don’t like what you find.

A recommended tool to find if you’ve been compromised in a data breach is, which may let you know.

8. Harlequin ichthyosis: It’s a severe genetic disease in which, at birth, a child’s skin is encased in thick white plates of skin, separated by deep cracks.

This has many complications – because there are cracks in the skin the newborns are more susceptible to infection and constant care is required to protect and moisturise the skin.

The disease used to be considered fatal, but in 2011 theArchives of Dermatology concluded:

Harlequin ichthyosis should be regarded as a severe chronic disease that is not invariably fatal. With improved neonatal care and probably the early introduction of oral retinoids, the number of survivors is increasing.

9. Your symptoms: If you think you are seriously ill, you should go see a doctor.